Weigh-In: 297.6
5-Day: 298.26 (new low)
In my family, it seems like we escape stress just long enough to take a breath, then it finds us. When it find us, it seems even more cruel, as though it is trying to teach us a lesson.
"So, you thought you were out of the woods, huh? Put your cart in front of the horse, it seems. You're gonna pay for that."
It happened again last night. No details, but we took another hit. Things looked very nice for a few days. They were looking up a little bit. Then, right when we were starting to relax, we got side-swiped. It's tough, and it keeps happening. It's the "one step forward, two steps back" scenario. We just can't get ahead.
My point is, I went to food for comfort last night. Two PB sandwiches, 2 cups of milk, a bowl of Fiber One (with sugar), and the milk in the cereal. I didn't add it up, but I had to have taken in about 700 or 800 calories from 9 to 9:45 last night.
I was lucky to see a 297.6 on the scale today. It makes me wonder what I would have seen had I left that food alone.
I guess that doesn't matter, now. The important thing is that I messed up. Did the food make me feel any better? Did it get me a job? Did it get food for my kids? Nope. It just made me feel bloated.
Life is playing a big game of dodgeball with us right now. We haven't played very well, and we're constantly taking shots right between the eyes. But we've been playing for a long time, now. Almost six years, actually. And the game is still being played, which means we aren't out, yet. Getting hit hurts, and often we need to head to the sideline until somebody can get us back into the game. But we always find our way back in.
In "Dodgeball: The Movie" there's a funny line:
"If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball."
Well, when my mom died, it was a wrench. When my close friend from HS was killed in a car accident, it was a wrench. When my grandmother passed - wrench. When my grandfather passed - wrench. When I lost my magazine - wrench. When we had to go on welfare - wrench. When Gracie went from delivery to the NICU - wrench.
Thank God, we're not facing anything like that right now. But that line from the movie works. We've dodged plenty of wrenches, so we can dodge this ball.
Man, I hope this doesn't sound as corny when you read it as it feels now that I'm done typing it.
6.08.2007
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4 comments:
I never thought "If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball" would be so inspiring. Yet, somehow, it is.
Hang in there.
When all is said and done, you're handling it. And doing pretty well I might add. Even when you do turn to food, it's usually nothing disastrous (because there's nothing in the house!), and you recognize it for what it is. You aren't letting it sideline you, and that's key. And you'll never be 300 again, wrenches or not.
Kevin my heart goes out to you and your family right now. I can speak from experience when I say it will turn around, maybe not when you would like it to but hang in there and dont give up the fight and you two will WIN!!!!
As for the comfort food thingee youve identified it and therefore youre now aware. Awareness leads to prevention. Thinking of it that way, youll beat that habit like youve done so many others. Hang in there!
I agree with what everyone else said, hang in there man. Good things happen to good people. Sounds like you have had a string of bad luck, better times have to be right around the corner and tomorrow is another day.
Take Care,
Ripx
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